Fist in the Frost

I've long been frustrated by my some of my classmates inconsistent behavior, in particular Beard.  When he comes from Judo directly to our class I would qualify his attitude as "frisky".  I mean that he comes across as intentionally cruel, but over the years I've realized he's just pumped.  This is validated by his regular days where he is caring, conscientious, and an excellent partner in the learning process.  Honestly there are these moments when he teaches me something very specific and granular and the simpatico that results feels tangible.

That being said, when I'm looking for excuses not to go to class he usually appears in my mind.  I have to psych myself up to deal with him which makes me tense and reduces the pleasure of learning and exercising.  

For whatever reason, that concern or fear left me last night a few hours before class.  I realized my attitude towards him and my desire to skip class on occasion was incredibly small in the greater scheme o…

There's a special type of anxiety I get from watching a test.  It's frisson of adrenaline that's born of fear, excitement and something I can't put a finger on, but I'm pretty sure it's that knowledge that you are going to come of it being something different.  

For whatever reason Storm's test meant a lot to me.  I ended up being on the judging committee and not really doing much other than catching his spinning back kicks and then taking lumps as the last fighter in his sparring.  

Still, I got to be there and participate and that somehow made me feel a little bit more like a blackbelt.  I realized that it has been two years since my test and I'm often shy about the fact. This kind of thing allows me to measure my success and comfort with my achievement.

During the testing we found out that Storm has two TKD black belts!  Outstanding.  He's also on schedule to test for his 2nd degree at one of those schools, but that's dependent on his ability to…